Lifebooks and other Inspirations...

by Liz

While I sit on the couch, house quiet as baby Ru sleeps, I'm working on Ru's Lifebook. A challenge that has teased and nagged and eluded me as I work on finding my wings as a first time parent.

Now its time to try on my wings as an Adoptive parent. I've filled out paperwork, gone to classes, read blogs, listened to professionals but now is the litmus test... I must make a book that answers, interprets, predicts and soothes. That fills in the question marks that can never really be filled in... see why I lag?

I've found my guru in Beth O'Malley's guide "Creating a Treasure for the Adopted Child." I recommend its step by step outline. But filling in the missing photos, links, stats, whys and what-ifs... well, I'm on my own.

I will post a series of links I've found useful for other adoptive parents in this project... hopefully I'll save someone a few late night minutes!

Life Books:

• Beth O'Malley's Guide: Creating a Treasure for the Adopted Child
• My Designs (see samples below) for Lifebook Covers

Adoption & Ethiopia Background Info:

• IRIN Africa: Ethiopia Coping with increasing Orphan numbers through adoption
• Times Online: Ethiopian Orphans Face a Life of Hardship
• Washington Post: Ethiopian Girls Run for their Life
• Ethiopia on Wikipedia

Maps & Photos:

• Listing of maps: click here
• Photos from TrekEarth
• Photos from Away.com

More Shopping & Souvenirs from Ethiopia

by Liz

My last post got me to recalling how in the pre-travel days when I had nothing to do but worry about details large and small of our trip to Ethiopia, in my lighter moments my thoughts would turn to "the souvenirs."  The less selfish side of me wondered what type of gifts I could find to give our little girl on the yearly celebration of her adoption day. Special little things to remind her of the culture, arts and life of her homeland... it was definitely one of the more pleasant things to contemplate. It occurred to me that other adoptive parents may enjoy the same diversion. So, for all those other families out there waiting; here's a list and some photos of my shopping successes in Addis. Most of the items were from the shops in Post Office Square (mainly from my favorite stand on the main corner across from the parking lot), and from the gift shop at our orphanage, Toukoul. The Toukoul gift shop sold a great assortment of woven scarfs, handmade quilts, table cloths, cloth animals and dolls, doll outfits (on the famous Ethiopian doll- the only one made in Ethiopia - see him/her in the photo - yes its gender neutral!) and the proceeds go back to the orphanage to help fund their Werku program to teach job skills to single moms so they can keep their families intact. So, on to the booty: 

1. Ethiopian Jewelry - I like the colorful chunky kind (ie. not the really expensive fine gold kind - its available at the Hilton but its not my style). Some of my favorites shown here came from the gift shop of the museum at the University of Addis Ababa (which I'd recommend - not just for the shopping mind you!). The rest is from the Post Office Square market. The finer silver items which look like Ethiopian Orthodox crosses are sold by the weight. One of the necklaces has a Haile Selassie coin on it.

2. Wood Carvings: Widely available but more expensive than I'd anticipated are the carved wooden animals. While you can find them here in the States (for about the same price), I like to know they're straight from the source. The male and female figures, which I love, came from the gift shop at the Hilton which has some surprisingly competitive prices. I always like to check their wares, go out and compare against the market and then know I could get them there if all else failed. I really liked the sculptural quality of the wooden hair pick. I think it may be better as decor than in use... its pretty sharp! The biblical painted piece is a reproduction and was described as what the early priests used to illustrate their stories since paper was not available. The art on it is representative of stylistic trends we saw in much of the Ethiopian art in galleries and museums. We were told the early painting styles were introduced by early Italian missionaries.  Another piece not shown here is a small stool hand carved out of a single piece of wood, it was a bit of a challenge to pack - but once we need a "time out" spot it will be worth every bit of the effort! There were many many great household items carved from wood - trenchs, game boards - all beautiful... if I'd only had more room!

3. Textiles - Embroidery and woven goods made great gifts for all my friends (in addition to the wooden salad spoons that pack easily and have a great modern look with their black and

 white bone handles). The traditional clothing we saw in Addis and during our trip to Awassa was mainly white with embroidered edges. We had hoped to go to Harrar which is known for the more colorful textiles but since it was rainy season we didn't make it.  The women of

 Werku who work for the Toukoul gift shop had made the very colorful scarfs shown in the photo with the molded plastic "original Ethiopian doll" dressed in their handmade male or female dress (at top of this post). I didn't see this doll available anywhere else in my travels so I felt lucky that they had them available, they also made the rag doll shown here. Each plastic doll has a tuft of molded hair on top and could easily be male or female (or hobbit...look at those toes!). The quilt, backpack, giraffe and rag doll in the photo were also from Toukoul. Some other items I found for my little girl were a cloth purse and a tshirt with Haile Selassie on it for her teenage years.

4. Woven goods - colorful woven baskets and serving trays were easy to find and pack and a 

good way to store and present all the great jewelry. The leather items will be fun to send her off to kindergarten with.

5. Artwork - We bought only three souvenir type pieces while we were in Ethiopia although we'd hoped to find a piece from a local contemporary artist. We did visit a couple nice galleries in downtown Addis but with limited funds ended up with our custom-ordered angel (see previous post), a historical style (repro) piece on an aged wood panel, and the biblical triptych shown in the photo with the carved items.  There were paintings available in the markets on stretched leather and parchment which some of our friends purchased. The frames made the packing process difficult. Our angel was able to be rolled and traveled well. 

6. Other Shopping Adventures - One of our favorite spots was a grocery store called Bambis. It was a relatively large one with a fascinating selection of local snacks, tea, chocolate, candy, liquor, coffee and some gift items. The italian pretzels were addictive! There was also a very nice but small grocery at the Hilton accessible from the parking lot.

Packing tips - We were lucky to be at our guesthouse with some seasoned travelers who advised us to save our plastic water bottles and any newspaper or shopping bags we received. When it came time to pack, we cut the tops and/or bottoms off the bottles to make tubes to pack delicate items like the wood carving in. It was genius! We had brought a spare duffle bad and was able to get all the bulky items in it padded with clothing and the very thick quilt we'd bought. The only casualty was one carved wooden candlestick.  

Start making your lists!

One of my Favorite Souvenirs of Ethiopia

by Liz

Our stay in Ethiopia afforded us some travel time to the city of Awassa, a drive around the legendary Mercato in Addis and many trips around the hills and streets of Addis mainly from the viewpoint of our chauffered Landcruiser - (we're sad to say it was our gilded cage).

Still, we did manage to grab some time to gather some treasures to bring home for our little one's yearly celebration of her homeland - which we've yet to find a good name for. The best contender so far (and far better than "Gotcha Day" is the Amharic word "mels" which I found in Rebecca Haile's book "Held at a Distance." She defined it as "literally a homecoming." In the context of her story it applied to a party being thrown for newlyweds... that's the best I've found yet... let me know if you've come across anything better?


Our favorite souvenir is this painting of an angel- an iconic image referrencing the fresco artwork from the church at Gondar. We had admired similar paintings on the ceiling of a small shop in the Post Office Square and the owner offered to have his friend, the artist, make us our very own version. We picked it up a couple days later; custom made just for us!

Tribute to Toukoul Orphanage in Addis Ababa Ethiopia

by Liz & Dan

(For more photos click on our slide show at the top of the page)

A photo tribute to Ru's first home in Ad

dis Adaba Ethiopia and the nannies, nurses, staff and doctors who held her, calmed her fears, wiped her nose, rocked her to sleep and taught her that the world is not such a bad place. To a staff that held her in their arms and in their hearts (some even had photos in their wallets)... there were tears shed on both sides as Ru took her leave. We will be forever grateful for your kindness.

Writing the Story

-by Liz

A lifebook, adoption story, birth album - a great creative project no doubt... but oh, the pressure! We had dutifully uploaded all the photos from our trip to Ethiopia onto the Walmart site ... and each time I logged in the ads to "Create a Memory book" winked at me...

For months now I've been tweaking, retooling, noodling, wondering... whats the best way to tell the story to a toddler, a child, an adolescent?... what pictures would I most want to see if I was in her shoes, how would I tell a story with so much meaning and so little detail? What could I tell her about her homeland when I'd seen so little from the confines of our daily gilded cage of a commute to the Toukoul Orphanage?

In the end I settled on a poem I found on an adoption site (below), a brief narrative and a hope that the pictures we have will tell a thousand words. Ultimately the story will be hers to create and to tell. We titled it "Rukiya comes Home"


We didn't give you the gift of life,
but in our hearts we know,
the love we feel is deep and real,
as if it had been so.

For us to have each other
is like a dream come true.
No, we didn't give you the gift of life,
Life gave us the gift of you.

Take a look and tell me if you think its ready to print?
Click Here to view our Ethiopian Adoption Memory Book

Imported & Moved

by Liz

The silence is deafening right? Ok, maybe just to me, but its been months(?) since my last post. New parenthood, work, renovations and moving... we bit off a bit much! I just thought I'd post this photo that I'm quite fond of. Someone actually asked a friend of ours if "that's the box she came in?" I just hope they were kidding! So, now we're moved into our new castle just down the street from our old one (don't forget to update your address books!). Next step; baby-proofing; this gal can cruise!

Its all about Ru

by Liz

I'm sure I could wax on about the small joys of parenthood; the special delight she shows when I come home, rocking her to sleep in the creeky rocking chair, the smell of her hair after a bath, the way she curls her toes when she smiles... but I know y'all just want to see the photos... so here goes:

Ru styling in a "little Miss Trouble" t-shirt from the Moss crew - yes - cell phone courtesy of our own favorite "Early adopters..." its a "retro" model (Brett; when are the kiddie I-Pods out?).















Ru, dressed for dinner at Fiesta Charra - Ole! Nothing like changing diapers on the floor of a Mexican Restaurant bathroom. Three cheers for hand sanitizer!







Rubber Ducky, Ru's the one. We all love to splish splash in the bath!




Got Rice?

And yes, Thank Heaven for little girls like Ru.

We're back as three

by Liz


She's a peach. A total peach. We're so very lucky and so very in love. She just sparkles and you feel lucky to be in her presence.

Ethiopia gets in you. Its intoxicating, beautiful, perplexing, haunting and elusive. Something about it gets lost in translation and leaves you feeling a bit incomplete. I know we'll never get over it, but we'll definitely go back. The pictures don't describe it; they leave out the smell of the eucalyptus fires and the lilt of the traffic, livestock and prayer chants. Its modern and ancient, current and rustic, welcoming and disconcerting. Through our daughter we'll be forever related to it, but never truly a part of it; always ferenge (foreigners).

We are forever grateful to the people of the Toukoul Orphange, admins to nannies to guards who daily open their hearts for the children who live there. They are as happy and secure as you could hope. The grounds echo with the happy sounds of a summer camp; hardly a place of last resort.

The staff truly cares and there were tears when Ru left her nannies. We'll have to send more photos for their walls and wallets.

Nap time is ending... mama's gotta run!

Day of departure

(by dan)

up before the alarm!

I'm sure that does not surprise anyone? not even me and I'm a sleep junky.
A habit that I understand will end cold turkey with baby Ru's demands.

I wanted to leave enough time this morning to spoil my dog Lola as I understand she'll be taking a back seat for attention when we get back...

and she's responding very well to the bologna that I've decided to eat for breakfast. Should we eat the entire package?

Must load up now on coffee and get crackin! Selam!
See you soon grandma and grandpa!
xo dan and liz

back drops

(by dan)

I have in my wallet a very dog eared little piece of paper that I've been carrying around since Wednesday, April 23rd- it's the first picture of Ru we received with her referral.

I've been starring at it for 75 days and the little girl in the photo has been starring back. She looks a little unsure of what's going on and seems to be hesitant to respond to the photographer. She is not smiling but not unhappy either. Just a little dazed- like the way I've been feeling this past week with the upcoming trip.

She has very big eyes and short curly hair. Her right hand is open and resting on her tummy and her left hand is slightly curled under. Both feet are in white socks. She's wearing a purple onesy that has long sleeves with white trim. She is sitting in a baby seat that is on a tile floor. She looks somewhat like a sweet little grape.

We are looking foward to taking many smiling pictures this coming weekend to share with you!

All my fears wrapped up in one sentence...

(by Dan)

Like many of you-

I have my favorite parts of movies- songs, poems, and for some of you- BOOKS EVEN! I do try to read books, occasionally- but... I guess I'm more of a magazine guy- or enjoyer of my own dreamscape at night... unless I've eaten too much pork and then I get my "porkchop nightmares..." which Liz claims might be from whatever I washed said porkchop(s) down with...

anyway...

I heard this one tonight from a movie called "OLD JOY" on the Sundance channel and it defined to me in movie words my own current set of fears and anxieties and the reason I've gone to bed the last 3 nights wearing my rubber mouth guard (the kind you get in 5th grade to avoid dental trauma in sports- or the kind you get as an adult that's "fitted" at the dentists office cause you grind your teeth that costs over $200 dollars- or the kind you still get if you're like me- at Walmart- the one from 5th grade- that only costs $3 dollars cause at 39 years old you're a bit price concious and paying for your own healthcare in America...)

So these two old friends are out camping- sitting around the campfire enjoying a couple beers- and the one guys says to the other- "So are you looking forward to fatherhood?"

and the other guys says "Well, yea man- definetly"

and the response: "Wow, you're really brave- I've never gotten myself into something I could not get myself out of!"

Parenthood anxieties defined for me at this moment!

I know these worries will change- evolve, etc.- Just like me- when I said oh- what 2 years ago? "I'm totally fine without having kids- not for me."

oh look out!

Just who is this "Biscuit Gang?"

(by Dan)




Our gang consists of 2 artists, one genius baby, a dog that skips and a very evil cat.

The genius baby has not arrived yet- we are adopting her from Ethiopia and going on an adventure to get her that starts on July 9th. Her name is Rukiya (Roo-kee-ya), or Ru for short. Ru will be 8 months old when we arrive in Addis Ababa. Stay tuned for more details about our new director of inspiration when we meet her.

Until then look for writing from me- her papa Dan Robertson that will be nervous in tone and at times highly exciteable or simply confused.

Actually that will probably be the way most of my writing usually sounds.

The other gang members: Liz Robertson- my wife. the other artist, (formerly known as a Stotler), who is also a graphic designer, writer, marketing guru, momma to be and believer in the good karma that floats around the universe that can occasionally be contained if you try hard enough to add to said karma. Also, she can also run with scissors.

The dog that skips is Lola. She's a rescue dog from Puerto Rico that is 8 years old. She's the original companion to our recently lost friend Otis the Chihuahua. (piss, vinegar, and foundly missed) Lola is very shy, screwy, dramatic and obsessive compulsive. When she's in a happy mood on a walk, she'll skip every 4th step.
She also looks a bit like Sandra Bullock.

Backing up Lola's timidness, and giving no quarter is our all black, slightly damaged cat Sinclair St. Claire. (aka Doom) He found Liz while relaxing on his deathbed under a bush downtown. He'd been hit by a car but couldn't be bothered to go to a vet. So we took him, "a cat, barely alive... Gentlemen, we can rebuild him, we have the technology... he will be better than before, Better. Stronger. More evil." Doom spends much of his time pouncing on Lola, stalking Lola, and grooming Lola. He loves Lola.

We look forward to sharing with you!
ds

Getting ready for Rukiya!

(by Dan)


Monday, June 9th, 2008.

We are 30 days away from ground zero and I am now getting really nervous. My nervous tick nervous. Last week I was only pleasantly nervous in the way that's to be expected. That motivational kind of nervousness that allows me to watch my wife assemble the crib and feel a sense of accomplishment.

In one month we will going to Ethiopia to pick up our daughter Rukiya who will be 8 months old and is patiently waiting in her crib next to a picture of her future momma and papa. She is in the Toukul orphanage in Addis Ababa, being very well taken care of and will be a most welcome addition to the biscuit gang.

Things I am currently worrying about:
Not dropping my daughter
Changing her diapers, changing her diapers on a plane. Diaper rash.

Keeping her hands and feet clean if she puts them in her mouth. Sanitizing everything.

Will she be lactose intolerant? Projectile diarrhea and vomiting, from both of us.
Will she be teething? does the cherry flavored teething medicine taste better than the berry flavored teething medicine I bought at CVS?

What's the difference between a digital thermometer for $7.99 and $49.99? Won't she going to be equally annoyed with me when I put a thermometer under her tongue versus in her ear?

Does the "Diaper Dude" bag my wife got me really look like a messenger bag?
Should I have gotten the camo pattern instead of the orange one?

Things I was previously worried about that are now on the back burner:
Achieving whiter teeth, My side burns. Getting sunburn. Gristle and lint.